I know from a very lived placed the deep frustration of wanting to create/make/complete something that I want so badly to bring into the world and then go blank, freeze, 'procrastinate,' have shame spirals, etc. when trying to do something I desire to do. For those of us with long anxiety/CPTSD/trauma patterns, totally common, totally personal and usually makes us feel really alone. Many of us who struggle with mental health stuff are actually alone in many ways, even among well meaning friends or family, in terms of getting relateable advice or support with specific challenges related to the blocks which may be preventing movement towards something special.
This website, the graphics I feel really proud of, the anxiety course I ran for ten months, a project I am working on right now with a collaborator (can't wait to share it) all bring me to places of 'not good enough,' freeze responses, triggers, etc. I share that because I feel both really proud of my work and the process I endured to get there, sort of having to use everything I know about my own trauma patterns and triggers to figure out how to come back into relationship to the thing I am creating, which is exhausting and annoying and all the things on any given day! My struggles inspired my to research 'project management' stuff which half of it takes more executive functioning and planning than I can really muster but did instill a deep love in me for the cycle of creating, for the life cycle of the project and for all the energy and support that it takes to bring something from gestation to life, living out there in our world.
If you have something you've been wanting to create, professionally, artistically, a project you are trying to complete as simple as trying to organize files on your computer or clean out the fridge, or something bigger like a creative endeavor, etc. and you feel alone, or like you are trying to hold too many of the pieces (like researcher, planner, designer, creator, cook, etc...) with momentum stalled, and you think maybe some nervous system-trauma patterns might be showing up, we can look at that, as well as what tools or shifts in approach might liberate some of the tension.
The things we want to create, things we love can become sources of pain, relationships we feel guilty in and that's when it can be really hard to try and piece that out while also being a self-motivated, likely underpaid project manager of the self. Plus, working alone can be really isolating. Decision fatigue is a real, real thing. Executive functioning can shift dramatically between areas of our lives and levels of comfort/safety.
So, if you want someone to help hold some of the pieces and provide a space to explore what's happening and what's not happening, I'd love to be a resource.
- Book a single appointment together to explore a stuck place
- Book a month of support, which includes two appointments
- If you think regular support would be helpful, book a monthly